Tom Crum introduced us to his centering technique during his keynote speech, but learning to choose a centered state of being is a life-long process. Recognizing this, Tom offers monthly reminders called Centering Hints. These stories, tips, and reflections are meant to support you in your journey to center. They are also a way to stay connected with Tom’s support network. We are told they have a mysterious way of showing up in your mailbox at just the right moment!

Sign up for these hints at www.aikiworks.com

Here is a sampling of past hints:

Hint #1: CRASH AND LEARN

When my grandson Colt and my granddaughter McKenna fly across the living room floor in the familiar toddler shuffle, it looks like you or me on a slippery slope:  legs flailing double-time in a hopeless battle against momentum.  Often, in classic toddler fashion, they trip over a plastic ride-truck or whatever is in the path and crash head over heels to the floor.  But then there comes this moment of truth when they look up to check out their parents' reactions as if to say,  "What's the right choice here, guys. Shall I cry or laugh?" 

Parental responses vary. Tommy and Kristen give high fives to Colt as they laugh.  Eri and Erin throw up their hands and yell, "Touchdown!" and McKenna lifts her arms into the air. If Grandma is around, she always chirps, "Wow, it's a good thing you're strong!"  Inevitably the choice becomes clear, and more often than not Colt and McKenna respond with big smiles, get back on their feet, and dash off.  In their minds, that's what a fun-loving, resilient person wants to do.

No matter what our age, the opportunity for shaping - or in our case, reshaping - our mindsets occurs throughout the day, every day.  We can pause, we can get centered, we can choose the thoughts and mindsets that we want to entertain.  And, if we can just honor the inner toddler in everyone, we can be more conscious about how we encourage others.

Jaime Escalante, the teacher on whom the movie "Stand and Deliver" was based, tells a wonderful story of a schoolteacher who had two Johnnys in her class.  One was a model student; the other was disruptive and never completed an assignment.  One day the teacher ran into who she thought was the mother of the "good" Johnny.  She told the mother how wonderful her son was, and how delighted she was to have him in class.  Within a week, she noticed how the "difficult" Johnny had become a different student - responsible, respectful, and fun.  The teacher told him how impressed she was with him.  Johnny replied, "My Mom told me how happy you were to have me in your class.  No other teacher has ever said that!"

Hint #2: Dealing with FEAR

Have you noticed that the emotion of FEAR is showing up a lot lately?  Fear of financial breakdown, the latest disease, environmental degradation, breached personal or national security. What a fabulous opportunity to work on ourselves and to turn FEAR into POWER.

When we're in fear, we're stuck in "time".   We are consumed with anxious thoughts about a future possibility, based on something from the past (real or imagined). Another way of putting it is to use an acronym for F.E.A.R. - "Fantasy Experienced As Reality".

One of the reasons I love my Magic of Skiing weeks is that winter sports create a real opportunity to experience an entire range of emotions, including fear.  Our goal is to help people learn how to center, to actively respond rather than react to fear - whether it's fear of change, injury, embarrassment, failure, or whatever. Let's say one of our Magic of Skiing pros notices that a pupil's movement patterns suddenly become tense and unbalanced: that the skier's perception of the situation has changed dramatically, and the emotion of fear is paralyzing his ability to move. It's as if his eyes are as big as his goggles, and he is standing on a knife-edged ridge on Mt. Everest. Our pro recognizes that the skier is oscillating between something that might happen in the future (a fall, an injury, an embarrassment) based on thoughts from the past ("I've seen this on TV", or "I once fell in this same place".)  Most of the time, the thoughts of the future and the past are actually fantasies, but they seem real nonetheless.

The best way to deal with fear is to go where it isn't - in the present. When we are in the present with full awareness, fear no longer paralyzes us and we are able to respond with power and grace whether it is on the ski slope, or at a meeting, or while dealing with a difficult child.  Our pros remind their skiers to acknowledge that they are aware of their fear, that it's good, and that it's an opportunity. Then they invite the skiers to take some deep, diaphragmatic, centering breaths, to begin to scan the body,  to become aware of the areas that they are tense, and begin a dialog. Where is your fear? Is it in your throat, your abdomen, your legs? How big is it? What's its intensity on a scale of 1-5?  Can you notice exactly where, in the next turn that you are going to make, that fear is the strongest? See if the size, color, or intensity of your fear will shrink, lighten, and lessen as you naturally begin a relaxation process, acknowledging your breathing.  Watch yourself as you gently move away from the future and the past, and shine a light of awareness on the present, where the fear can no longer reside.

When the fear has receded into this more centered, aware state, the skier can begin to return to action. He could do so in small 'present moment' chunks, to simply see the possibility of one easy turn, to perform it, and then to stop. He can then build from that one-turn-at-a-time sequence into two turns and then three, and so on, as he becomes more and more comfortable.

Whatever our situation, as we get centered and present, our fear will shift into useful -rather than abusive - energy. We begin a journey to center, achieving maximum joy and minimum struggle in skiing and in living. 

Hint #3: Dance on a Shifting Carpet

Philosopher Alan Watts once said that we live in a time of "unreasonable insecurity" caused by cultural change, technological explosion, informational overload, and decaying relationships. Guess when he said that? It was in 1951! Heck, those were the "Leave It to Beaver" days. What would he think about the world today?

On the night of one of the most significant, transformational elections in U.S. history, it began to snow here. From a wildly-colored fall with week after week of warm temperatures to one foot of glorious fresh powder on the top of Aspen Mountain! For mountain ski towns like we live in, where the economy depends on snow, it was indeed a sign of possibility and a bright future.

Before long, kids will be running as fast as they can along the street, then leaping on to  patches of ice and zipping along, turning and spinning, falling and sliding, laughing and rejoicing. Icy patches aren't a problem to them. They are opportunities. It's the same for the people from all over the world who will come to mountain towns like Aspen for the privilege and fun of dancing on a shifting carpet, skiing down a snow-covered mountain, full of constantly changing terrain and snow conditions. And they love it. Why? Because they choose to. They choose to see a slippery slope as a wondrous opportunity to get even more centered and more aware and to strengthen their minds, bodies, and spirits. Taking responsibility for carving a new path and a nurturing relationship with the mountain is a very joyful thing.

The carpet that is our world today - just as it was for Theodore "Beaver" Cleaver - is shifting dramatically. Instead of resisting the change by staying stuck in our fears and insecurities, let's breathe deeply from center, garner some of that snow-riding spirit, and capture the exhilarating flow of change. It's a time to discover what is most meaningful in our lives, and express it in everything we do. We can all learn to dance on a shifting carpet.

Sign up to receive regular hints